Bullying FAQs

May 24, 2008 in Bully Facts, Bully Helps by bullyfre

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Bullying Guide

Here we have compiled a series of answers to your bullying questions, providing in a bullying FAQ format:


What is bullying?

* Physical or mental abuse such as hitting, nipping, scratching, being called names and taunted on a daily basis.

* Receiving unwanted and often threatening e-mails, phone calls and text messages on a daily basis.

* Constantly being made to look foolish in the classroom by a teacher, such as being called stupid, thick and general put downs that happen on a daily basis.

* Constant attempts in the workplace to undermine your status, value, position and potential.

* Being put down or patronized constantly especially in front of others.

* Being overload at work or having major work taken away and menial tasks assigned to you on a constant basis.

* Having annual holidays, sick days and compassionate leave denied on a regular basis within the workplace.

* Being given disciplinary procedures for trivial reasons or made up ones on a regular basis in the workplace.

How do I recognize a bully?

* Bullies will very often be in gangs and will be the leader, they will delight in the power that they have over the victim and enjoy feeling powerful as head of a gang.

How can I tell if a school has a problem with bullying?

* Check the schools attendance records, schools which have a big problem with bullies usually have a bad attendance record. This is mainly due to victims of bullies having a lot of time off from school because of the bullying.

* Look for a high level of staff turnover, staff are reluctant to work in schools were bullying is rife.

* Check Ofsted reports for signs of bad behaviour on record.

My child is being bullied on the way to and from school

* Some schools have a policy that the school is responsible for a child’s safety until they reach home, other schools take no responsibility for your child once they have left the school premises. Most schools however will do all they can to help a child who is being bullied. Schools realize that if the bullying is occurring out of school then it will most likely continue in school if the children attend the same school.

My child was being bullied and now fights back and gets into trouble at school for it

* Make an appointment to go and talk with your child’s school and tell them your child was being bullied and explain that they have been told to stick up for themselves and have begun fighting back. Unfortunately most schools have a “two wrongs don’t make it right” policy and will class your child as misbehaving if they are fighting back against the bullies.

* Make sure your child understands that there are different ways of standing up to a bully and that hitting back isn’t always the best policy, explain to them that walking away doesn’t mean you are a coward and the bully is getting away with it but that it means they are a stronger and better person than the bully by just walking away.

The school my child attends seem to trivialize bullying

* All schools have to meet certain guidelines and all schools should have a policy regarding bullying and how to deal with them, if you think your child’s school isn’t taking bullying seriously then first you should make an appointment to speak with the head teacher and ask about the schools bullying policy.

Make it clear to them that your child is being bullied while in their care and present them with any evidence pertaining to the bullying incidents. If you are still not happy with what’s being done in school then take advice from higher authorities such as Ofsted.


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Bullying Questions Videos

Fox News: Hypocritical Bullies?
Was I A Bully Growing Up, Or A Scapegoat? (EXPLICIT)
Heart Against Bully
BULLY COALITION (Shawnee,Oklahoma show 2008)
SPEAK OUT: Young People Against Bullying!
Fire In The Hole And Why Bullies Are Pathetic


Bullying Questions Question & Answers

Bullying Questions Question: 1


two bullying questions, survey...?

1) according to you, what are the characteristics of a victim of bullying? (not characteristics of the bully, characteristics of the victim). As in, what are different characteristics or weird things about a victim that a bully would focus on? 2) we've all encountered bullies, some are just bullied more than others. what are the emotional/personal effects a bully has had on you? serious answers only please, this is for a report

Answer:
1) they are usually nerds and they can't defend themselves or they are emotionally weak they are also like timid and will do anything the bully wants them to do.(believe me i know) 2)to tell u the truth that bully made me become the me that i am now. I'm stronger, have more friends, and i don't let nobody boss me around!

Bullying Questions Question: 2


Questions on bullying in Canada..?

I'm looking for parents/teachers/children/teens perspectives on bullying in school in Canada. Preferably Ontario. I am doing a presentation for parents/teachers and would like to know if you had a question to ask what would it be? Presentation is only 5 min. long but people can come up to ask questions after. What would be important for you to know? For people being bullied, tell me about your experiences. What helped? What can you do legally? What have parents done before? What role do teachers play? Thanks ok I want views on Bullying from all over, not just Canada. I don't seem to be getting a big reply in Canada, so could other's please give me their views and experiences. Thanks

Answer:
I'm a teacher in the UK and very aware of bullying in my class/school. This is such a big issue. I never suffered bullying as a kid, but I am suffering as an adult at the moment. What has helped me is a special phone line and friends that I can talk to about it. I have also told my union and human resources and they are giving me help and support. I try to instil in my classroom ethos a sense of respect and rapport for others. We use circle time to tackle issues and I am known as a teacher that will listen to both sides of an argument. I do not have favourites. That is not to say that I do not have children in my class who are not being bullied. It is unfortunately a characteristic of human behaviour. Recently I noticed a child behaving out of character, very withdrawn and depressed. When I tried to talk to him he would not share his thoughts with me. Later that day I was told by the head that the parent had complained about her child being bullied. I was upset to think that: 1) one of my children was suffering. 2) neither the child or parent had confided in me. He did confide in me later and we eventually were able to work on the problem. What I have learned as a teacher is: - that the victim needs support as soon as it is noticed, but it may take some time before they are ready and willing to face the situation/name names/admit there is a problem. - that the children need to have a way to communicate with you. They need to know that they will be listened to and taken seriously. - that the children need to know what true bullying is. They need to try to avoid the 'cry wolf' syndrome as it leads to parents/teachers/adults not taking the true cases seriously. It does help to have an overt school policy that has a no tolerance attitude to bullying. Ideas that have been suggested in out school are: -playground buddies -school councillors/mentors -bully boxes (this tends to be abused) -assemblies about bullying -secret buddies (where the children pick someone's name randomly from the class list to be nice to them that week) At the end of the week the children try to guess who their secret buddy was. They suggest the name of someone that has been nice to them that week. Names that are mentioned over and over again are praised and rewarded). There are no easy answers to this. We have to be supportive and patient with the victim and firm about what is acceptable behaviour and what is not to be tolerated.

Bullying Questions Question: 3


2 questions about bullying, for a report, take seirously....?

1) according to you, what are the characteristics of a victim of bullying? (not characteristics of the bully, characteristics of the victim). As in, what are different characteristics or weird things about a victim that a bully would focus on? 2) we've all encountered bullies, some are just bullied more than others. what are the emotional/personal effects a bully has had on you?

Answer:
I think bullies look for someone who might be smaller than they are, doesnt have alot of freinds. Won't stand up for themselves. 2.) NONE, my parents didnt raise me to follow the pack, to march to my own drummer so inside of me I am strong. Once It made me cry and the girl came back the next day thinking she was going to pick on me and I got so mad I told her to shove it up her a s s infront of the whole lunch room, she never bothered me again plus everyone knew I was in karate and being taught by a fellow student who had 4 black belts,lol

Bullying Questions Question: 4


im thinking of doing a citywide survey on bullying to find stats on bullying wat questions should i include?

thanks for your suggestions www.antibully.tk

Answer:
Ask the kids how it makes them feel to be bullied? What does it do to them? Does it affect their self esteem and in what way. Do they ever think of revenge and what type of revenge?

Bullying Questions Question: 5


what's with all the questions about bullying on yahoo answers?

can i have some examples i've never seen any. bullying on a message board how does work?? maybe i'm being an idiot but seriously i dont get it.

Answer:
I rarely come on here in the evenings so these were emailed to me by people too frightened to say anything because the wrath would be directed towards them. I first came on here and within a couple of hours saw disgusting posts by 2 users in particular, 1 debating fiddling with a little girl with a terminal illness (A user named Eden's daughter) and the other encouraging and laughing about it. Since then I have tried to redress the balance a little, it's not my nature to let it go unchallenged. That's the background, but to answer your question This: Usually I am blocked (which should suit us both) but she unblocked me so that I could see these answers. I have also never emailed her, nor would I. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Aq8wFSo2GFLBS9Bp.hM5vl_G7BR.;_ylv=3?qid=20071007101107AAKel5E&cp=2&tp=2&tnu=34#all- which came shortly after: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Am8ACPE5jDoI7hUVIZhZpkrF7BR.;_ylv=3?qid=20071007082404AADmXtG There were others last night that you my have seen, but they have been deleted. If you put freethinker in the answer search there is a back catalogue that has not been deleted. eg: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Am8ACPE5jDoI7hUVIZhZpkrF7BR.;_ylv=3?qid=20071007082404AADmXtG or http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AqW2bnZR8I2fPwDkbKq6tzUjzKIX;_ylv=3?qid=20070815074945AAkngks. Feel free to check my Q's and A's and all I ask is that you make up your own mind

Bullying Questions Question: 6


5 open-ended questions about bullying that I should put on my survey?
Answer:
why do you bully someone? how do you bully someone? should I bully someone? when should I bully someone? where should I bully someone?

Bullying Questions Question: 7


I've seen a lot of questions about bullying here lately ??!?

don't you think school should be able to diagnose the problem and at least make an effort to stop these bulliers?? I'm 14 btw , I just feel sorry for them =(

Answer:

Bullying Questions Question: 8


I know there has been a lot of questions about bullying but...?

Over the weekend our puppy died. My son is 8 and was close to the pup. He was the pup's boy. So yesterday [monday] at school my son was talking about it and this kid comes up and says to my son "I don't give a c*** about your G** D*** dog so just shut up now! This made my son very upset.. He cusses at my son constantly. He does this to other kids too, not just mine. The teacher says that this boy gets his name on the board all the time. What does that do?? So what, his name is on the board? I've talked to the teacher to no avial. The boy still picks on him. Just a few weeks ago the boy took my son's puzzle magazine and threw it across the playground. I told my son to 1. Tell a teacher 2. If it happens again walk away 3. If it still happens ignore him 4. If it happens again then tell him off. My son is sick and tired of being picked on. Any ideas on what I should do? I called the school and they said I have to work it with the teacher? That doesn't help! Any ideas? I plan on taking him out of public school next year and teaching him at home. I want to try that and see if it's something we can do. He says I teach him more than the school does but we'll see how it works. I don't have the option of private school, I don't think there's any near us. I've talked to the teacher nothing happens, and this is a teacher who won Teacher Of The Year last year!!! I'm so angry I want to shake the kid. Of course, I won't because I don't like the idea of jail and I don't really believe in child abuse! I can't talk to the parents because the boy rides the bus home. I pick up my son. But I told my son to ask the kid for his phone number in hopes that he won't know that I'm calling to talk to his mother. I'm about to shake her too! LOL You all have great ideas. I'm going to tell my son next time the boy picks on him to say something nice back to him! I think that would really catch him off gaurd. I know it would me. LOL Thanks to everyone. My son cannot be transferred to another class because it's the GATE class {gifted and talented class} and it doesn't happen during class just at recess. Even if they weren't in the same class they would still have recess together so he'd still have the problem. Unfortantly a new class is not an option.

Answer:
If none of this works, i suggest advising your son to do what the bully least expects, tell him something nice. Tell him that God loves him, that he forgives him for not knowing how to express himself, ask him does he need a friend to talk to, etc. Although it seems that telling him off would work better, the truth is that it would only intensify the situation. The bully wants that negative attention and conflict. If your son only responds nicely, not cowardly, but nicely it will not give the bully the satisfaction of aggravating him. That's what makes the bully feel powerful, controlling the feelings and emotions of others. He will feel that bothering your son is a waste of time if he can't get him angry.

Bullying Questions Question: 9


What do so called "Christians" get from bullying and harassing questions on here?

I have notice that a very prolific minority (David Israel is but one example) seem to post endless diatribes against gays with a rhetorical question worked in. What do these so called Christians get by spending so much time on a LGBT forum like this? Does any one think they really believe they are doing the Lords work by insulting and being sanctimonious? It seems their bombastic attacks would have the exact opposite effect.

Answer:
There are 2 different types posting in this group. The first types are the ones (such as David Israel) that feel the need to spread the word to as many people as they can. These people can be shown other Biblical passages that contradict their question. The second types are the ones whose questions are actually diatribes against gay people and they are bigots that are only using the Bible to hide their bigotry. The best thing that can be done with bigots is to ignore them. Some Christians take the words literally (from whichever version of the Bible they are using) instead of seeing the message and some go to church and are told what the Bible means instead of reading it and interpreting it themselves. By posting these messages, they fail to realize that they are making Christianity look like a religion of hatred.

Bullying Questions Question: 10


Do you think the intolerance we have seen here in some questions and answers is really bullying?

check out the definition of "cyberbullying" from Bill Belsey at bullying.org

Answer:
Yes, I do. People talk about free speech but that only seems to be an excuse to be a bigot, people don't always try to empathize and some will moan about their religion being attacked whilst using their religion to attack. Some people also create threads to attack a person in a town close to them, if that isn't bullying then I'd be amazed

Filed under: Bullying Guide: Learning About & Dealing With Bullying

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