Bullying Guide

There are many different reasons why bullies target people but some reasons are consistent in most case of bullying, so what draws a bully to their target and why? Here are some of the reasons:

* Bullies are opportunists and usually it’s a case of you were in the wrong place at the wrong time and the bully found that they can intimidate you easily.

* The bully is jealous of you and secretly wishes they were like you.

* The bully is afraid of exposing their inadequacy and you only make them feel more inadequate especially if you are excellent at your job or school work.

* You are popular and therefore get more attention than the bully and this is how the bully wants to be.

* You are independent and don’t need to get strength from others, bullies often get strength from their “gang of followers” who find it funny that you are tormented.

* You have many friends who like to be with you just for you.

* You have nice possessions, the bully is often jealous of those who have what they don’t.

Do any special events cause bullying?

As a bully is usually jealous of others achievements there are many events that can trigger bullying such as:

* Your performance at school or work is highlighted by such as awards or praise.

* If for any reason you suddenly become the focus of attention, this often occurs with female bullies.

* Standing up for a friend or colleague who is being bullied.

* Telling tales, this can be incompetence at work for instance or something that is done illegally.

* Displays of affection and trust from others.

* Seeking advice from trade union officials during disputes at work.

* Refusing to obey orders you don’t think are fair.

* Gaining promotion in the work place.

Qualities that bullies find irresistible:

Bullies are particularly drawn to people with the following qualities:

* Popularity – This brings out the jealousy side of the bully.

* Intelligence – This only enhances the bully’s inadequacies.

* You always give 100% and will do anything to help others – This brings out jealousy In bullies.

* You are imaginative and creative – Again shows the bullies incompetence.

* You have a strong sense of right and wrong – The bully will never admit to being wrong.

* You prefer to talk rather than fight – The bully sees this as a sign of weakness.

* High level of tolerance – The bully will try and break you down through bullying to prove he is stronger than you.

What the bully really is:

* A convincing liar who will say and do anything to get out of trouble or around problems in their life.

* Is excellent in deceiving others particularly peers.

* Emotionally insecure and untrustworthy .

* An arrogant person who believes themselves to be untouchable.

* Has a need to control people and alienate them from others.

* They are always takers and never givers.

* Someone who poisons peoples minds with lies about you.

Filed under: Bullying Guide: Learning About & Dealing With Bullying